Rough Time

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We ended up, finally, with a couple of inches of snow this morning. My kids, or maybe one was my husband? Were kind enough to send me photos.

I’m in agony. I was whiny yesterday? Ha ha! I tried to stay moving so I wouldn’t stiffen up. Today, I am like Frankenstein’s monster. I have nearly no fine motor skills. I crash around like a huge boar.

Something strange happened this morning. I took my medicine, the marijuana oil, and a while later I felt better. I had been lying still, but I felt dramatically better, and just a bit loopy and nauseated. Did I accidentally take my medicine twice? I feel really good. Just sick. Oops! Then I was ill, which happens so often we keep kidney bowls nearby. I just coughed up some bile. I had to use the washroom. As soon as I went to stand- oh, yes! I had the correct dose. It is very strange for me to do things out of order. But if I had doubled my dose, I could not be in THAT much pain, I am fine. So I hobbled back into bed, and finished a couple of errands I needed to do.

On days that are not so intense, I can keep moving, even if I don’t walk around much. This means my back doesn’t hurt nearly as much. On days when the pain is head to toe, though, there is just no way to deal, except to get through it and recover and piece myself together on the other side.

I am so glad my family is understanding.

My lovely cousin was stuck in town at the airport this morning, when I was at the peak of my stoned-ness, (?) Or whatever was going on there: trying to relax and not cry. She messaged me, I know she could tell I wasn’t myself. I hope I didn’t scare her!

I’m sure it will alarm at least a couple of family members to see me. Over the last three years I’ve lost 120 lbs. Mostly due to gastroparesis, but I know this will be universally ‘positive’ however losing as much as 40 lbs in 3 weeks due to vomiting is not the right way. My body just rejected food. It was horrid. I’m straightening my lovely curly hair because I lie down so much the curls just get crushed and become difficult to manage. That wheelchair we will be investing in. I’m falling so often from my knees giving out, and don’t forget that damn exhaustion!

Ah, well.  Speaking of exhaustion, I am going to have a nap, as I haven’t been sleeping well. I just got a new onesie from Torrid, it has Hello Kitty on it! Just some sleep and when the weather breaks, I need to wrap some gifts. I do this every year. I shop, forget what I buy, my husband hides everything, and when it’s wrapping time, there is a mountain of things!  Ah, its usually small stuff. My daughter’s usually a good helper.

Okay! Gotta nap this out! My lower back, oh wow! Can they do transplants yet?

Feeling Okay

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It’s strange to wake up a couple of days in a row and not feel like you had been locked in the trunk of a car overnight. My back is still sore and my breasts have been inexplicably tender for the past couple of weeks. The nausea is still present, but quite diminished, which is a treat! However, the pain is so much less. I feel normal?

I did add to my troubles yesterday when I had dinner. My husband feeds me a half a cheeseburger with bacon for dinner on Saturday. We have been discussing the size of patty for a year now. I told him he needs to make them thinner or remove the bun. He grudgingly removed the homemade bun, but it was back last night. Knowing he went to the effort, I tried it. Wham! As I opened my mouth, and then wider I could hear the creaking of my jaw and then felt the flash of pain. I felt the whole bottom part move over? Is that a thing? I don’t think my jaw opens smoothly, it opens partway, then moves to the side to open more. I could hear the grinding and clicking, and then a snag. But the pain! I will speak to my dentist when I get there. I had a pretty bad headache last night, but I’m just a bit sore today. Soft food.

I did get lots of stuff done yesterday! Played around with my makeup, got some shots for my Instagram, Beauty blog. My daughter harassed some people to ask why they aren’t following my blog, it was sweet. 💜 I must be dying 😂

Vaping is the activity of the moment, more makeup (lots of stuff dropped this week) and hopefully I don’t try to overdo it!

Wishing you some pain diminished moments, Zebras! 😙