On the Mend

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With each day, I’m feeling slightly better. My kids have a four-day weekend, so I turned the alarm off today, as they are old enough to look after themselves in the mornings.

I slept until ten or so, and stayed put until noon because my face hurt. My son checked on me every couple of hours, as per my husband.  He’s a good kid. Our daughter got up around 1:00, but made it downstairs and crashed on the couch and could go no further. Poor kid, she was sick during the night and couldn’t take in any food.

My husband was so sweet, on Wednesday, he stopped at the eye doctor to get his eye infection checked out, and I was sleeping, I didn’t answer his texts, so he decided to pick up a gluten-free pizza for me anyway. He walked into the restaurant, and they greeted him by shouting out our address! 😂 “Hey! It’s our address! Good to see you! Do you want your whole order? Oh, just the gluten-free, okay!” He then took my husband on a tour of the kitchen, showing him the kitchen, the way they clean the area for gluten-free cooking…it was amazing. My husband is very recognizable. At 6’5″, with a slim build, he’s not hugely imposing as a figure. He looks much younger than his 48 years, as evidenced by being asked to join a kickboxing group for under 35s recently. 😂 He is usually smiling, and is very kind and generous, which helps. He also has really huge hands and feet, which people often notice and comment on. He also has a large nose, which he has broken playing football. I think he’s handsome, but he doesn’t photograph well, mostly because he hates having his photo taken. Anyway, I’m blathering because I miss him. He’s kind of a memorable face. People tend to remember my curly hair.

He brought me home pizza on Wednesday night. (Pizza Pizza gluten-free is so good, btw) and I had some, because I was so hungry, but um… bad idea. So I had some yesterday and today. It was only a small, and the kids don’t like the crust, but I love it! It’s settled well.

I’m still weak, and that might take a while to remedy. I’m currently drinking water and G2, a Gatorade derivative that does not contain glucose-fructose. I want to stay on FODMAP as much as possible. I had the orange chicken from Panda Express for dinner on Sunday and it was not worth the pain I experienced.  Holy Moly! I promise to be good from now on…

My eyes are still hurting, but aren’t as productive as they were. As long as I take Tylenol cold formula or allergy formula, it keeps it in line. I’m cleaning them gently, and it’s mostly the left one. My husband asked the eye doctor, and as long as it’s mostly my lid and not my eyeball (and it is) we aren’t panicking. I rarely panic, anyway.

So, game plan for now is lots of liquid, Gravol as needed, Tylenol complete, and resting. Same for the girl. Our son is doing an awesome job at looking after me while I’m sick. Rest assured,  we don’t ask too much of the kids, just that when I’m sleeping he look in on me every couple of hours, or as he passes on his way to the washroom. He brought me the pizza and a plate, and a G2. Our daughter yesterday had to bring me the bucket when she wasn’t feeling well, so she had it worse. I’m so glad she did though. Ugh. I think she slept on the couch last night to have clear access to the downstairs bathroom. Jumping off the top bunk would not be fun at 1:00 am. They are almost 13 and 15. How did I get so old?

I’ve been spending the day puttering around on the internet, so now I want to go over my spending budget. Blah.

Tiredness is setting in. Until next time!

Stay lovely, my fellow zebras! 😘

More Feelings

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Wasn’t it just three weeks ago I was all tearful and sobbing? Yeah it was. I checked the date, January 21, 2017. Here I am feeling like an idiot again. This is kind of hard to explain to people who don’t have chronic pain, and maybe this is something that is really unique to me, but let me try to explain how I feel. Firstly, my body feels like I was in a bar fight last night, with the Montreal Canadiens. And Tie Domi. I also feel like I may never ever stop feeling like this. I worry I’m starting to become a burden.

People tell me “don’t be silly, or don’t think so negatively!” I’d rather have evidence that I’m not a burden.

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Then, when I get onto social media and everyone is sniping, speaking condescendingly to me, missing obvious hyperbole, being obstinate for no purpose… I find myself ditched by people I had admired… my feelings are hurt, but not in a “whyyyy?” way, but in a “am I really this out of touch?” way. It makes you rethink people you had associated with and trusted. I continue to place my trust in the wrong places and be burned. I fight the urge to pull back because it is not going to be advantageous in the long run. Only if I continue to put myself out there, will I make valuable connections along the way. Some tears will be spilled. But if we’ve experienced no failures, it means we’ve taken no chances.

Maybe I’d be stronger on a better day. Today I feel like everybody thinks I’m an asshole. Which doesn’t mean they don’t like me, but that I’m really not that bright. I do get that a lot. Thinking about it now, it only bothers me from the few people who know me and think this anyway.

It’s as if makeup sucks the intelligence out of your head. Dare to show an interest in artistry, and God forbid a concrete thought enter your brain.

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I don’t know why people who have known me for years don’t ask me questions and instead get defensive. If I say something that comes off mean, I’ve probably missed a word! Or a sentence! I don’t think I’ve ever said anything deliberately mean to anyone. So why don’t people ask me? It’s not like something actually happened recently, it’s just this has been on my mind.

My Mom sent me an email around midnight last night saying her skin was itchy and flaky, so I called her today, and we went over some options. I think Husband needs to stop at the drug store to get some things and I will ship it to her since she can’t get out because of looking after my Dad. I have the nicest man in the world! I just talked with him and he was so accommodating!

My husband and son are out shopping for shoes for the kid and getting Panda Express for dinner. It’s off my diet, FODMAP, but what’s more pain? That orange chicken is worth it! I was in labour for 96 hours with that girl! Oh, this is my daughter’s birthday dinner. We are starting early and snacking all day.

It’s super snowy here today, so I know that’s making things worse. 😣 My pain gets bad in snow, and awful when temperature fluctuates.

I should go play with some makeup, that ought to make me feel better. Maybe.

Have a bendy day, zebra friends! 😘