Oh, Great! *Eyeroll*

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Fantastic development. Along with the neck pain, back pain and dizziness, in there with the nausea and headache, forgetfulness and general discomfort. Alongside the inability to sleep properly and horrible concentration, it seems I’ve caught the cold the kids were passing back and forth.

Fortunately, it’s not too bad, and the CPAP machine I use tends to cut down on the amount of mucous in my nose, so I have fewer breathing issues. I just have a vague sore throat and have this mantle of exhaustion that is unusual. I’m used to being tired, but I’m achy and uncomfortable, I can’t settle. I think that tipped me off that something was off. Also, my nose is booger heaven – ugh.

Lack of quality sleep is not helping my concentration or cognition. I will be watching a show, it will cut to commercial, and I will completely forget what I was watching. I’m having trouble communicating verbally, still, most of all, and paper is only marginally better. (I could be writing my name over and over thinking I’m being brilliant right now!). There is one Simpsons commercial that comes on, and I get so excited, thinking I’m watching the Simpsons. I feel like such an idiot when the commercial ends.

My Mom seems to think my family has terrible luck and absolutely everything happens to us. I admit, it does sound shocking to listen to someone with chronic pain describe flare-ups. I had been silent for years, but I think people ought to know what my life is like. Not in a complaining way, but in a this-is-how-people-live way. People have chronic pain. This is my life. My kids have had quite a few illnesses this year, yet this is my first cold, I think, since being ill at Christmas, with the rest of the world, and it’s mild. My husband has glaucoma issues, cataracts, and arthritis. Both run in his family. My kids have Autism. Sounds like a lot of families I know. Maybe these families aren’t so open, I don’t know.

I should get that nap.

Stay stripey my Zebras! 😘

Family Time

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Yesterday was Mother’s day, and I woke up to my alarm going off at 9:00. I usually sleep until 10 on Sundays, but have been enjoying getting up slightly earlier lately. Plus, my makeup look didn’t work out on Saturday, I wanted to try to squeeze in two looks as well.

I texted the kids, and was greeted with my usual Sunday fare of chocolate chip pancakes and coffee. My son carried those, and my daughter held a huge bag from Pandora! First to come from the bag was a gorgeous fuschia matte lipstick from Urban Decay called Menace that my son picked out. Apparently, he sat in the store with my photo and the lipstick samples and tried to match them. He will be 13 next month. He’s quite diligent. He was deciding among Menace, Alpha and EZ. He told me, even though I’m an Alpha, the colour wasn’t quite right. And he doesn’t think I’m EZ. Menace didn’t fit, but the colour is gorgeous!

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The cigarette holder in the middle is actually the Finger Brush. 

My daughter, 15, gave me a lovely glass box engraved with ‘Always my Mother, forever my friend’. So sweet. My husband gave me a bangle from Pandora, and of course we have the Finger Brush from Saturday. It’s called a finger brush because it’s supposed to mimic the action of your finger, in brush form.

Yesterday worked out well. I pottered and put on makeup, ND had very little pain and pressure. I was able to do two looks, no problem. Well, small problem. I was so tired by the end. I had to fight through.

Today I was battered, but I’ve managed. I played makeup today, I worked on an 80s look today that was fun. I was so tired and sore by the end. I needed a bath, too. I was going to bail, but I snuck up on myself. I almost dozed off inthe tub.  I was washing fast, before I fell asleep.

I’m fighting now to stay awake. I might get an hour before dinner. My back is killing me.  Gonna do it!

Hope your Mother’s day was great, Zebras! 😘

 

Improvements in this Crisis

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I had a very good day yesterday, considering. I feel like I’m getting the hang of this, even though I really would rather it go away entirely.

I even had the chance to play with makeup. It isn’t a huge deal, but I had a good time. Took some nice photos. The Becca x  Chrissy Teigen palette is really great!

It seems I have a good few hours in the morning, from when I get up at 6 until 9, and then I need to rest, preferably lying on my side, and then I have a bit more time, after my vape. But then I need to nap. On my left side for sure for at least three or four hours. Then I can semi sit up for a couple more, the rest of the evening is spent alternating between lying on my side and trying to sit up or be propped up on pillows. I get somewhat dizzy being propped up, but I don’t want to give in too easily, I want to heal, yes, but I want to develop tolerance as well.

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I still am quite nauseated, but it’s diminishing. The back of my head is very tender. It makes me think this is more to do with my skull fracture of 1992. I just have a feeling. I don’t have the headache I did, but I have a lot of pressure that builds along my jaw around the back of my head that builds where a headache would be. It’s very strange.

The good news is, I’m more comfortable, at any rate. I’m still not certain what will come of this, if this continues, I will just hang on until I see my pain guy next month. My short-term memory is shit, but I will just lay fairly low until then. Try to not embarrass myself. Too badly.

Have a wonderful Wednesday, Zebras! 😘

Unnngh

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I’m so stressed. Yet it’s mostly self inflicted. I mean, I think the pressure is self inflicted.  Ì ended up sleeping a lot again today. I couldn’t stay awake, and my back and abdomen were just screaming in pain. I must have overdid it yesterday. It’s so irritating that I put on makeup for 20 minutes and it caused me to have to sleep for the day. I’m at a loss as to how to cope because there is just no help available until my doctor appointments unless I go to the hospital. Honestly, what can they do for me? I mean, besides berate me for wasting taxpayers money. Never mind the people going in for sore throats because their doctors office is closed.

My husband is working hours and hours, I haven’t seen him in days. I miss him. I also have to have an uncomfortable conversation with a person because they are doing things that are crossing boundaries and I’m not happy. I’m too exhausted to deal with this. I just want everybody to leave me alone, except the people I don’t want to leave me alone. 😁 yeah, it’s just as bad in here.

I don’t want to sleep my life away.

Hope you’re having a great evening, Zebras! 😘

 

Busy Couple of Days…

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The past couple of days have seemed like a whirlwind, even though, I suppose, Thursday I spent resting up for Friday! ‘I’m leardening’ as Ralph Wiggum would say.

Thursday, I really shut down for the most part. I had a friend call me that I hadn’t spoken with in a while, so we caught up a bit. My neck was hurting so much, I could barely concentrate. I slept the rest of the afternoon, and into the evening.

Friday we prepared the family to drive an hour to an hour and a half north to visit 20170415_121301my hairdresser, and then my parents. So after four and a half hours in the chair, I emerged… redder! I’m naturally curly, but I should keep the blowout for a few days, as it helps maintain the keratin.  You can see how tired I am in the photo. But, back in bed, yay!

After, we went to visit my parents. My daughter and I were so tired, my husband had to say, come on, but it didn’t take much. I miss seeing them. We didn’t get to stay long, but my son just blossomed in their presence. I have such great kids. My Mom made me this gorgeous Afghan, she actually made me two, one in pink, one in purple, and let me choose. It was tough! I wanted both! 😃 My Dad was pretty responsive. He has severe depression, he can’t always be present when we are there. It was good.

I have some stuff I want to do while I still am with cutlery. Soon!

Be well,

Have a great afternoon, my Zebra hombres! 😘

 

 

Nesting

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I’m deep into Nesting mode today. My ex husband used to call me hamster girl, because I love organizing and reorganizing all the things. Whenever I’m “sitting still” you can usually soon hear the rustle of paper. Today I went through all of my makeup and reorganized it. It was already sort of organized, but I redid it. Tomorrow I will tackle skincare. Unfortunately, I tried a look after I did the organisation and when I took the photos, my eyes are wonky. My eye pulls in when I get tired, and it doesn’t take much these days. I’m seeing the eye doctor in a couple of weeks. It might even be next week. I’m going to have to show him these photos.

I had a great time watching South Park while doing this. I love this show. It’s so obnoxious.  It makes such good points. My son’s friends watch it, so if he wants to watch it, I’m glad we do it together so we can discuss what he sees. I don’t know if, at almost 13 he quite grasps sarcasm and irony, and I’m happy he will discuss things with me enough to let me talk with him and ask me questions. I love the one where Kanye is making sure Kim isn’t a hobbit, and the one where Stan and Kyle try to beat a million on Guitar Hero. The music is great! Kansas, The Ramones, and I find it okay! Yay!

I’m still having abdominal cramping, but it’s more muscular than digestive, although digestive problems are happening because I’ve been on a chocolate binge lately. It doesn’t take much to upset my system, but it does take a certain amount to satisfy me! Oh well. Gotta live.

A friend asked me an interesting question the other day. I mentioned the cramps, and she misunderstood them for digestive cramps, understandably, and asked if I was going off FODMAP. No, because it was different pain and we sorted that, but I thought, what is after FODMAP? What do I do after that? I can’t seem to tolerate anything forbidden, and many things allowed on that diet and am still mostly nauseated and having heartburn. I am better in terms of bloating and gas, most of the time I know why I am suffering.

I was going to post yesterday, but I decided to nap instead. So selfish. 😁

My head and neck hurts so much. I’m trying to be cheerful, but it’s tough. I feel like my laughter is a little loud and hysterical.

I can vape again, right? I’ve been teaching people in the house how to help with my apparatus (age appropriately, no kids touch drugs, but they can find my discard bin and get my tubing) so I actually will instead of just lying here.

Have a fab day, Zebras! 😙

Return of the Porcupine

dk6cthn9wog2kMy husband and I have been referring to the pain in my lower right quadrant of the abdomen as my ‘porcupine’ for a while now. It feels like a giant porcupine is sitting there, as there is weight, and it doesn’t hurt unless you move. Then you have a stabbing, sharp pain.

My pubic bone is also back to aching. I’m tired. But I still feel pretty good. Better than I usually do. Because I’m usually aching all over, too. So, today I’m going to rest and see if I can’t prolong this winning streak! What a lovely surprise!

Yesterday I became curious when I ate lunch and became bloated and gassy again! A glance at the ingredients on the crackers reveals the suspect! Beet fibre! I’m allergic to beets! My husband knows this! I’m skipping them today to see if this helps.

My daughter is back at school, she seems better, still tired, though. My son is home again, still dealing with anxiety, I think. He has started testing for Autism, and is on the spectrum for sure. He is so precious, I worry. I know he has stomach issues, as autistic individuals often do, but with pain and sprains, I think EDS? I can’t help it.

My husband’s eyes turned red with irritation again. This time the eye doctor changed the glaucoma medication. We wait with bated breath.

I’ve had a blast playing makeup the past couple of days. I want to again today, but I should probably nap instead. I’m so torn!

My cannabis doctor just called and moved my appointment from the morning to the afternoon. They are always moving my appointment around. It is so irritating! My husband takes time off work so he can take me there. Then they change at the last-minute. If I could swan in anytime, I wouldn’t need the medication. Luckily, my husband took the day off this time instead of the morning. Only two people ahead of me, too. Last time I had to wait an hour and a half. It hurt. I was in tears. My old doctor retired to go into addiction recovery. Maybe now I will get someone who will stop trying to get me to cut down. I want this to replace my opioids, not the other way around. Plus, this guy was trying to shame me over my use! Having never used a vape machine before, sorry sir, there was a learning curve. I don’t exactly hang around with anyone who can show me. The stuff I threw out for the first three months was still green.

Anyway, I’m enjoying the heck out of myself. I’m puttering around, getting a few things done, but that nap will be coming up soon. I might even get a read of my book! I don’t know!

I hope you enjoy a respite as well, Zebras! 😙