Friends!

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Yay! I have friends! I’m even wearing people clothes!

This past week has been a nightmare. That flu bug wiped me right out, and I am still feeling weak. Yet I am recovering faster than I have from other viruses, so I will take this! My daughter is still battling, she had to stay home from school, her headache was too intense.

My son is out for his first overnight trip! He’s out with the school. He has been bouncing off the walls all weekend. This will be so great for instilling his confidence. He’s a great kid. I’m just having trouble seeing my babies grow up. I had some insomnia over the weekend. I was the same way when his sister went.

If there is any confusion between the My/Our pronouns with the kids, there are just two kids, sometimes I remember to share credit, and sometimes I don’t. 😁

My good friend called me this morning, and we had a great chat, until I had to go, I suddenly started to feel awful again. But I had a nap, and if my surrogate little sister wasn’t coming to visit, I would probably still be napping!

My surrogate little sister is a good friend of my actual sister, and used to live with my family when she was a teen. I’m 14 years older than my sister, so I was long gone, but she’s an important part of the family. I haven’t seen her in at least ten years. She’s going to be surprised when she gets let in by my 5’9″ daughter who was knee-high last visit. 😅

I had to cancel my doctor’s appointment tomorrow at 1:00. I’m so annoyed. My husband can’t take me there, because he has to ‘work’ what kind of stupid excuse…( totally kidding ) No, he has to work, and the boss is out or something, and I can’t get there on my own because I’m so sore and weak right now. I have this awful pain in my abdomen that hurts when I sit up straight for more than a couple of minutes. Sometimes it twinges right away. I can’t seem to determine if it’s gynecological or gastrointestinal. We chased the gynecological theory for years, but my gastroenterologist was so dismissive and, frankly, rude, I’m not excited to try again. I mean, on FODMAP my inflammation issue is down, but the two spots of searing pain in my gut and my right lower abdomen are still present. The nausea has not gone away.

My friend has come and gone. We had such fun, and such a good chat. She lives an hour away, and is so kind to come visit me! She’s seeing her actual sister today, but had an extra couple of hours. I think we killed that and then some! Such good fun! I showed her part of my makeup collection. Silly bunny came to visit all made up! Who does that? I’ve actually resorted to storing my makeup in tubs. It’s just easier.

I love visiting, but I don’t love how tired it makes me, or how exhausted I get so quickly. I’m too young for this! I demand a recount!

We’ve made plans for next month. Visiting Bite Lip Lab, North America’s biggest Sephora is in Toronto, and lots more chatting. I have to rest up! Two venues? That is a tall order. I am excited to try!

It’s really nice being dressed. I feel so accomplished.

I haven’t been vaping the past few days, just using the marijuana oil at night. I’ve been worried about the vaping affecting my eye swelling flu thing, and been too nauseated to try, anyway. I’m hoping the pain in my back is ramping up only because of this, and not for some other fun reason. It is the most likely, however, hoof beats and all…

Hope my zebra pals had a peaceful day! 😘

I’m Gorgeous! (Not)

I had a super painful boutique of painsomnia last night. As I was u6hjv9jgygs4orolling over to my left side to go to sleep, my left knee subluxed and I was in a lot of pain. I couldn’t quite settle it into place, and lay aching from 10:30 until I gave up at 2:00 am.

At 2:00 am, I gave up and picked up my tablet, started playing on the internet. I had to dim the light way down, because my eyes really hurt. I was able to chat with my sister in Beijing around 6:00 which is a nice treat. I haven’t spoken to her in a while. She was on vacation in Indonesia recently, and didn’t even load photos up anywhere! But Saturday is her busy day, and she told me this hilarious story about one of her 4-year-old students punching her in the face. I’m pretty sure the hilarity was in the telling.

After we chatted, I fell into a restless sleep, and woke up to my alarm at 10:00 am. Damn me for deciding to be productive on weekends. I hit the snooze for an hour and got up to use the washroom. I got back into bed, and decided to survey the damage of my face.

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My left eye is quite swollen. It looks hilarious. It’s not quite as weepy, but is tender. When my husband brings our son home from therapy, I think we should call Tele health and check. My eyeball isn’t infected, or I should say affected, I’m just sore around the eye, the left one, and I sleep on that side -so it’s drained into that sinus, we figure. I have taken Benadryl allergy complete, and am sitting propped up, but it’s not draining, really.

I don’t want to go to a walk-in clinic, especially while flu-ish because I don’t want to catch something worse. If it’s not urgent and can be managed, I’d rather hang on and go see my GP on Tuesday, because of course it’s a long weekend! I’m sick just about every long weekend, it’s a running joke. Our daughter is sick, too, poor sweetie.

To add to my grotesque appearance is a large pimple where my chin used to be. It’s scabbed over now and looks like a cold sore that got lost.

I need a bath so much. I am so sore, and my hair has been two weeks without a wash, and needs detangling. It would have been so good if I could have gotten to it even a day or so ago! I just do not have the spoons. I will have to tackle it first thing tomorrow. Put the family on notice. I feel so weak.

I had a neat conversation with a friend today. She is a nurse, and gets the flu shot because of being around immune compromised people like me, but she hadn’t noticed a difference herself. I explained how normally, a flu could keep me sick and essentially unconscious, because I’m sleeping to get better for six weeks or so to gain my strength. But when I have a flu shot, and they get them right, I recover much quicker. I’ve been sick nearly a week, but I’m not sleeping the whole time, and I have been keeping food down, etc. She didn’t realize it could be that bad. She’s so lovely. I’m sure she’s a great nurse!

pg2bvxtorfh32I went on a bit of a shopping spree last night. Urban Decay was offering triple points, and I’m determined to make top-tier, for some reason; and then I bought some lipstick. If I can’t put it on, at least I can buy it! I have to stop with these sprees, especially when I’m over budget. Our tax system is such that our payroll tax, I think it is, starts in January, and when your contribution is full, they stop collection, around July. This means my husband loses $1,000 out of his cheque for six months and then we forget the rest of the year. Every January it’s a new round of belt-tightening. What? Save money for the lean times! Pshaw!

There have just been so many escalating costs, too. Especially just around the first of this year. I think I’ve whined about this plenty. I won’t bore you more. It’s tough finding things to do when your concentration isn’t great, and your hands don’t work so well. Online shopping is so much fun, but that gets old too. It’s just stuff. I am enjoying playing with it when I can. I’m enjoying blogging here, too. I’ve met lovely people. Only lovely people.

I’ve offended people talking about my spending, but they may actually do things, outside, like in public. I don’t think they even realize there are months I don’t get to leave the house, so $300 on makeup isn’t horrid. What did you spend $300 on last month able person? Lattes? Taxis? Lunches? It adds up. I didn’t have those expenses, at all. But I do realize I have privilege. Many people don’t have the means. I married a smart, hard-working guy, and we have had some really lucky breaks along the way.

I’m aware I may be babbling. I’m in that hazy, cool, fun, dreamy, tired state.

I often resent that I had to stop my career, such as it was, to tend to my broken body. What could I have done if I had gotten proper support instead of being encouraged to go on LTD? Would I have been a better employee were I not in pain all the time? I don’t know. Life is this way now, and I’ve spent so much time getting to know myself, I wouldn’t trade with anyone now.

Our son is going on a class trip for four days next week and I’m stressed.  He’s growing so fast! Ugh, these kids give me so much stress, and are my world, all at the same time. I didn’t realize parenting would be as much fun as it has been. I’ve laughed so much along the way! There have been lots of tears, too. But lots of laughs. I will be so relieved when he’s back home.

Probably should nap now. My eye hasn’t changed, but is getting tired.

Wash your hands, my zebra pals! 😘