As I was mentioning in the wee hours of this morning, I tend to
- Get distracted by shiny things
- Go on tangents
- Go on rants
Since I share a birthday with Dennis Miller, the third one should not come as a surprise. Due to my personality, the rants tend to be fairly loud, but good-natured.
I don’t know if this is a product of
- Brain changes or neuroplasticity (I SMRT)
- The wonderful medications I’m on
- EDS in general
- Aging (I R Old as you can probably guess…)
- Adrenaline spikes that happen with EDS
For example, in my middle of the night post, I was very tired and couldn’t remember if I was to use the term lying, as in lying down or if that was the term for evading the truth and lying down was spelled lieing (when you are distracted by pain, sometimes silly things pop into your mind, you just think through it.) And then I thought well, is it supposed to be laying down? Well, no, because that would be like laying an egg. (See what I mean?) If you don’t pull yourself back to task you can be gone for hours. It’s like thinking through molasses, or running through water.
Sometimes I will go to answer an email and find myself writing a review of hand lotion 20 minutes later, it’s like- well, I’m still on the computer, OK. Good start. Other times I’ve found myself cleaning out junk drawers, or painting my nails.
So, I’m tired this morning, for having a protracted sleep having drifted off around 3 am. Oh, everyone is tired! Yes, I hear that. When you add this on top of chronic fatigue, it’s unreal. I’m feeling almost incoherent. The effort it takes to put together a sentence…I have to really focus. It’s important to me, though.
I have an appointment with my therapist this morning. She’s wonderful and works with me by phone. My doctors are happier when I have a therapist, I get fewer accusations of being depressed this way. I will explore that phenomenon very soon.
Setting up this blog was hard work, but fun. I haven’t been able to work in years, and my migraines have been bad, but, piece by piece I did it! It took a long time-about 7x as long as it would have in my normal brain, but that’s gone! I will keep tweaking as we go, let me know what you like.